So, I spent the day going through and cleaning my room. I decided that it would be a good way to get my 41st birthday off my mind. It truly didn't bother me until my daughter got engaged and my son got married. We, also, have a younger son who will be 16 this year. It's all been a bit overwhelming. Especially because it has all happened in such a short period of time. As I was going through some of the photos, I found myself getting a bit teary eyed. The pictures were like a flash into the past. As I looked through them I was reminded of how quickly the whole last 20 years had gone. It seems like yesterday we were running kids all over the place for sports, school, and dance. When you become parents, everyone tells you that it goes so fast. However, between the diaper changing, teaching them how to ride bikes, first dates, and all those other moments you get lost in time. My husband and I have always tried to be a part of their lives. We got to know their friends, spent many days at sporting events, and always kept the lines of communication opened. Even if that meant going on a long car ride with the doors locked and no way for them to escape us. We are finding ourselves having to adjust to having all this free time on our hands. Quite honestly, we have never had so much time alone together in the 20 years we have been married. To top it all off, we have always worked separate shifts in order to have one of us home for the kids at all times. Yes, this means we have to actually share the bed and wake up to each others beautiful faces everyday. Sad, but true. It's like having to get to know each other all over again. I have to say it has been both a good and bad thing. However, I can say that I am reminded everyday of why I fell in love with him. Morning breath and all.
Has I was taking a trip down memory lane, something occurred to me that hadn't before. I realized that although our children are growing up and starting lives of their own, they still need us. Just in a much different capacity then before. It also occurred to me that we wouldn't change a thing. We couldn't be prouder of the people our children have grown to be and the choices they have made for themselves. They have all come so far. So I now see turning 41 in a different light. It's almost like a new beginning. Not just for Paul and I, but the kids too. Every moment should be just as cherished as watching them get to this point. Even though our youngest has a couple of years to go, there will still be big decisions for him to make. Decisions that will effect him once he gets to the same stage has his older brother and sister. All of this started making me think that maybe getting older isn't such a bad thing. Maybe it can be just as wonderful as the last 20 years (putting my health struggles aside, of course). Just like the last 20 years, there is no way to go back and get a do over. So I am embracing this point in my life, right now. It's going to be a wild ride. But then again, that seems to be how our family does things. So, we are going to buckle up and roll with it.
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